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By Gary Gordon Dec. '00 (as performed in Gainesville, Florida at the Civic Media Center, Dec. 20, 2000) Colonel Cathcart & the Queen of Hearts 're playin' cards at the foot of her bed Alice and Yossarian huddled in the closet The Queen shouts "Off with yer head" "What game is this?" asks the White Rabbit The pills've clearly worn off He sees he's arrived too late The game is already lost An' if a rose ain't a rose Then a thorn can be fun By any other name Let's say justice is done Now somewhere out in Texas In the land of the Alamo Davy Crockett an' Willie Nelson Watch the motorcade start to slow Davy asks "Should we recount the bullets? Was it three or four or five?" Willie says "Let's get stoned on the grassy knoll An' keep hope alive" An' if a rose ain't a rose Then a thorn can be fun By any other name Let's say justice is done At Cape Canaveral-Kennedy-Canaveral It was one small step for man "What did you know and when did you know it?" Was the theme song of the land From the U2 to Cambodia Pick any lie you like Maintain plausible deniability Launch a protective reaction strike An' all the leaves are brown An' the sky is gray Casey's at the bat Playin' for the CIA From out of the west where Christ was born Came the long, tall savior Trading arms for hostages Making war with Grenada Then Kuwait, it was threatened Democracy must be restored Alice-- remember Alice?-- and Yossarian are ignored An' if a rose ain't a rose Then a thorn can be fun By any other name Let's say justice is done John Tower buys a round of drinks Bork padlocks the Doctor's bag Hart and Clinton bring the girls Reagan and North bring the swag Bill Gates and Rupert Murdoch are Fighting in the Captain's Tower Do you want to be a millionaire? Regis is King of the hour An' if a rose ain't a rose Then a thorn can be fun By any other name Let's say justice is done In a land that's known for sunshine Even the rain must fall Ponce de Leon took an arrow When he tried to build a mall Leave it to the Grand Rehnquisitor To launch an Equal Protection Strike Yippie ti yi yo ti yay It's the Texas cowboy Reich An' if a rose ain't a rose Then a thorn can be fun By any other name Let's say justice is done But if a rose is a rose Then a thorn makes the blood run By any other name It's justice undone Yes, if a rose is a rose Then a thorn makes the blood run By any other name It's justice undone By Gary Gordon April '00 (as performed at Jeremy's Cyber Cafe in Joshua Tree, CA, April 2000) I met a waitress, her name was Honey It didn't matter I had no money She gave me lovin', I gave her the same She said someday this will be over Don't fall in love, or you'll soon discover A broken heart is the greatest cause of pain CHORUS Truer words were never spoken She warned me that my heart would be broken I didn't listen I fell straight into that well A fool for love is a dime a dozen I volunteered, didn't wait to be chosen I didn't listen So this is the story I tell I met an actress, said her name was Heather When I asked her real name she talked about the weather We had fun til she saw that look in my eyes She said someday this will be over Don't fall in love, or you'll soon discover A fake name is just the beginning of the lies CHORUS BREAK Sometimes love is like oil and water Sometimes the mix is a thousand times stronger You never know when the chemistry will explode She broke my heart, I'm like hundreds of others The brokenhearted, we're a band of brothers In the world of love there's blood that runs hot and cold I met a woman, her name was Nancy T-shirts and jeans, sexy, not fancy I gave her lovin', she gave me the same One day she got that look in her eyes What she said took me by surprise She said our love's the cure for our brokenhearted pain Truer words were never spoken She healed me, my heart was no longer broken You know her lovin' gave me a new start A fool for love is a dime a dozen I volunteered, didn't wait to be chosen Love's the cure for a broken heart Love's the cure for a broken heart By Gary Gordon Jan. '01 (as performed in Santa Monica, CA by The Gary Gordon Band at Arcadia [on the Pier], Feb. 2001) I have a friend who thinks a butterfly's wings flapping half way around the globe Gives him a reason to leave his wife I have a friend who thinks that the pain in his heart is too unbearable Gives him a reason to end his life CHORUS And I work from nine to five Just to pay the health insurance bill It helps to keep me alive So I can pay the health insurance bill And the beat goes on And the sun goes down And every day is a day is a day is a day, oh I don't know They call it right and wrong And the sun will be up first thing tomorrow I read the newspaper story about rats who have these dreams It seems they really dream they're racing through a maze I see on the TV it's Hope and Glory and Love and another story It seems everyone is racing through the latest craze And I work from nine to five Just to pay the health insurance bill It helps to keep me alive So I can pay the health insurance bill And the beat goes on And the sun goes down And every day is a day is a day is a day, oh I don't know They call it right and wrong And the sun will be up first thing tomorrow BREAK I woke up this mornin', you were on my mind, I said Hello Darlin', but you were not there It seems a butterfly has flapped its wings Now you're gone and I don't know where And I don't think that a butterfly's wings flapping half way around the globe Give anyone a reason to leave their wife And I hope everyone one in pain can a story that will sustain them Help them not to take their own life And I work from nine to five Just to pay the health insurance bill It helps to keep me alive So I can pay the health insurance bill And I work from nine to five Just to pay the health insurance bill It helps to keep me alive So I can pay the health insurance bill Gary Gordon Productions Homepage |