Highway Gump Revisited
By Gary Gordon, July 1994
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"I was feeling kind of seasick When the comet hit Sent me into a light fandango Followed by a bowl of Cocoa Krispies Hadn't eaten that in years Should we call out the agitators? Is there something in the air? Clinton visited the floods in Georgia Fell out of the boat and drowned Al Gore took over Nobody noticed All part of the cultural memory loss Legend has it you can pinpoint the moment when people forgot everything to the moment when that plume of gas shot off Jupiter But nobody remembers for sure So now everybody just wanders Scratching their heads like goofy cartoon characters Trying to figure out what they were about Looking for clues Here's a street: we must travel here Here's a streetlight: what's that mean? Here's a lottery ticket: that must be important The library's closed: must not be important Here's huge well-built homes where only a few people live Here's shitty shacks where lots of people live; What's that all about? Was Elvis president? Was Nixon a rock star? Who is O.J.? Mama says when a comet strikes a planet and everyone loses their cultural memory, There are lots of questions Maybe more than ever before
People bump into walls and say "Okay, I hear you" or "I'm a victim! or "Bumping into walls is my job" They used to say "Ouch". They read newspapers watch TV listen to music go to movies Trying to sort it out Who are we? What are we doing here?" A week after the Comet hit an answer begins to sweep the population: We are here to wear Sunglasses Sunglasses are cool It is the thing that everyone in the culture can agree on and does well Maybe there are other cultures halfway around the world who disagree So what? Sunglasses are cool and we are here to wear them Everyone looks better in sunglasses Fat people Skinny people Hip people Nerds Blacks Whites Any color No matter Sunglasses make you look cooler Ask James Dean Or General MacArthur Or the Highway Patrolman Or the jazz player Ask anybody
So the sociologists and anthropologists and TV talk-show hosts and newspaper pundits begin their scramble Why do Sunglasses make everyone look so cool? What is it about our society? Our make-up that makes this simple thing so? It's an image Deeply ingrained in the modern population Hasn't existed long But long enough Deep enough Jesus didn't wear shades Or Galileo King George the Third Or Davy Crockett It's in the 20th Century DNA Sunglasses? Cool. So now it's two weeks after the comet hit Everybody's wearin' shades Readin' newspapers Trying to follow something called The Health Care Reform Debate The National Drug Policy Debate The Crime Bill Debate None of it makes much sense But there is a movie everyone is starting to buzz about It's great, it's great, it's GREAT, IT'S GREAT!!! It's all about recent history, they say It tells us what we once knew but forgot when--
"Did a comet hit a planet? Well, this movie, it's about a guy like us Doesn't know much Means well bumps into walls and apologizes Well, he met presidents And fought in Vietnam And was the fastest runner ever (Faster than O.J.) And he was the best Ping Pong player ever And that's why there's peace with China And he helped John Lennon write a song And he helped make up that bumper sticker, you know... And it shows what really happened in that war See, our soldiers were nice guys Victims, really They shoot only when they're shot at That's what you see And you don't see them kill anyone And these peace movement people They wear strange clothes They love to say the "F" word 'cause they're obscene And one of them hits a girl And the black ones carry guns Our soldiers didn't hit any women But the peace movement guy did Our soldiers didn't threaten anyone with physical violence But the peace movement people did That's what you see That's the images on the screen Images for our DNA For our cultural memory loss Powerful Like Sunglasses? Cool?"
I was feelin' kind of seasick When the crowd called out for more And God told Abraham to kill his son I asked poor Howard where can I go Mack's trying to unload busted telephones At the foot of a statue of Paul Revere's horse And Saint Annie and Sweet Melissa are dancing with the Sergeant-At-Arms Mama's in the basement Someone's trying to sell me a postcard of a hanging While a promoter's trying to stage the third World War My job is not to endorse your values My job is to point out what I see And I've just seen "Ballad Of A Gump Man" On Disinformation Highway 61
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